No, seriously. There's something wrong with my subconscious.
I know no one really cares about your dreams unless you dreamt about the person you're telling your dream to. However. I'm posting every day and sometimes that means you're going to read about my dream. Deal.
So, I'm dreaming. I'm in some sort of hybrid of Goonies and EuroTrip - a group of friends, traveling through strange and possibly dangerous lands, looking for something. I just wasn't sure what. Then, a dashing older man in a suit sort of whisked me away. At first, he was potentially dangerous - maybe he was hiding what we were looking for? And then, we were on a date.
Yeah, I don't know either.
So, we're driving motorcycles - we each had our own badass Harley - and we stop for dinner or something. This is when I realize that my mystery man... is Dog the Bounty Hunter. Yeah, you read that right. And I'm having a lovely time with Dog and he's very rough and manly and sexy and stuff. I would like to point out that, in my waking life, I do not necessarily find Dog attractive. He seems like a very nice man* and kind of charming, but he's a little too weathered for my taste. However, in my dream? He's the hottest.
And then it occurs to me, wait a minute - Aren't you married, Dog? And I'm so disappointed. "mmm" Dog says, and looks at me with, well, puppy eyes. "Doesn't your wife mind?" I ask. And Dog just took my hand in his, ever so gently, and it was awesome. Like, remember when you first started getting interested in sex and relationships and stuff and how when you finally had a crush on someone who crushed you back, it was so thrilling and butterfly-ie and wonderful? It was like that. And then my alarm went off and slapped the snooze button. As I was drifting back to sleep, thinking of Dog, my mind brought up what he actually looks like - with the vest with no shirt and the long mullet and the leathery eyes and I thought "What is going on in there, brain?"
*He's a born-again Christian and he does seem to be genuinely interested in helping the people he busts get their lives back on-track, however, he was in prison for first-degree murder, which is generally not a nice thing. Then again, he seems to truly love his wife and children and care about the people around him so, I guess people can change. He seems like he'd be a good guy to have in your corner.